Calories... Who knew

I guess that strange woman frantically crumpling that snack bag to check the calories was right. I remember telling her, "calories won't hurt you!" She replied with a very definitive, "oh yes they will." I have counted carbs and fat grams and mostly stuck to just cutting out food groups. That only got me so far. Week after week I have just known that I could NOT be losing weight and this wouldn't work. Well I am now 1.5 pounds down past my goal of 135 and I am still going strong. I actually bought a size 4 pant- yes I'll say it again- a size 4 pant on Friday. I am sick of having sag bum droopy drawers in all my pants so I ran to the outlet malls after I picked up the kids from school. (I pass the outlet malls twice a day every school day and I have only been 3 times- wha!! that's self control right there folks.) Anyway, I bought a couple of pants in a size 4 and wanted to burst into tears while the lady checked me out and scream, "Can YOU BELIEVE I'M buying a SIZE 4?" But I controlled myself and calmly walked out of the store. These are my pants and they are comfortable and cool and I have no saggy bum!

 

Okay- so the main reason I started doing this (besides the fact that I have my whole life tried to lose weight) is because I want more kids. I am terrified of having another baby, but I want another one sooooo badly. Actually, I am terrified of preeclampsia, having a baby is nothing, it's the stay in the hospital and the constant hovering and worrying about my dang blood pressure that has me freaked out. I am a homebirth kind of gal and 3 out of 4 of my kids have given me problems!! See, they start before they're even born!! Anyway, I'm still trying to get over my fear and after losing 35 pounds I feel I can conquer anything. I mean look at those goofs- I made those (I guess I'll give JEebs a little credit)- but how can I not want another one??

...and Mooks is the cutest thing since cuteness was invented.

And my girls

This is my baby girl and my grown up girl. How am I old enough to have a 10 year old? Taylor had her first piano performance last night. We played 2 duets at a retirement home and she did great. I really want to get Mookie that ridiculous swim hat, but I know she would never keep it on. My girls are always thwarting my plans!

Yes I'm bragging

I ran into Express at the mall today because last week I didn't get a chance to try on clothes at all. I grabbed a size 6 jeans and hurried to try them on before my kids threw a coup up on me. They were loose! SOOO I had Jeebs grab a 4 and guess what- yeah those...those jeans in those pics down there. They are a size 4. While I have weighed this much before, I have never had a size 4 jean on my bum zipped up and fitting. I don't really like the way that style looked on me, but guess what?? They're a size 4 so who cares?

This is a size small top (which I had to get because I loved it and it was a size small- hollah!) with the jeans- did I mention they were size 4's? This moment right here was worth every face melting workout and every "is that all I get to eat of that?" moment. I wanted to cry and jump up and down and scream at the same time. We went to 5 Guys for lunch and I got a hamburger. It was delicious, but really not worth it. Even though I will be staying in my calorie allowance for the day, I know it's going to be rough when I workout later today.

Recap: size 4 jeans- WORTH IT! 5 Guys to celebrate- NOT worth it.

GOAL!!!!

33 pounds down and I am there! I think I want to try for 10 more. It's amazing what 33 pounds does to a belly.

This is breakfast...

Almost every day... 385 calories. 2 eggs, 2 pieces of Ezekiel bread with 1/2tsp of butter and 2 C of unsweetened chocolate almond milk made with stevia. I love it and look forward to it every day. Weird? Maybe. I could probably eat it for dinner too. Also- 3 more days until I get to eat chocolate. I need it this week.

Shoo- wee!!

Mookies favorite thing is to have stinky feet. She puts her feet up to every body's nose and waits for the gags and acts of disgust. I think AJ's response at smelling her sock was the best. He threw it down so fast, crinkled up his nose and about faced immediately to escape the horror. He's one and a half- so you know it's bad.

Also working out still sucks. I'm thinking I want some time to do easier workouts, but dang, I like having muscles too much.

WHA WHAT!!

I am bending over to kiss Jillian's feet today. I would also like to knock her in the face, but mostly just kiss her feet because all the pain and agony is worth it when you get on the scale and hit 136!! A pound away from my goal. I have not been this low in...a while. And, I did it without having daily panic attacks about food. I ate and I melted my face off 5 times a week with Jillian's workouts. They suck, but for the first time in my life I have arm and back muscles which is pretty awesome. Also, having babies messes yo' body up- before at 135 I felt super skinny, now I still feel like I have a belly that needs to go! (and I don't think that 1 lb is going to completely get rid of it) Oh well...today I am celebrating!!! I want to buy new clothes, but I want a new house more sooooo I'll just shop and try on just to scratch the itch.

that dang belly.

After an hour of hardcore jillian.

Our few quiet moments

In the evening Jeebs and I have a few small moments of peace and quiet. We take advantage of it by watching stupid tv shows (dance moms woohoo) and I chew gum that loses flavor in 5 seconds so I stick it on my nose or make a breathe right strip for Jeebs.

Jump for joy spring break!!

We went to airborne to jump for a while over spring break. My neighbor took the kids one day and they had a blast so we thought we'd go again. Pictures are hard to take when everybody is in the move, but I did my best. I even jumped and only wet my pants a little. It's so fun being a grown up that has pushed 4 watermelons from your loins.

This is where I try not to get discouraged

I knew it was going to happen. I just had that feeling all week, but I have for the last several weeks and it hasn't happened...until today. I GAINED almost a half pound. Yes, I stuck with my diet, yes I upped my workout level to hardcore and did every stinkin' exercise. And yet, there it was...a gain on the scale. BAHHHH!! I am soooo close. Last week if I stood right on my non-digital scale I was in the 130's!!! (and yes I know how insane that sounds) This week clearly straight up 140. ARgh. I blame Easter. Easter was ham, bread and a crap-ton of cadbury mini eggs and dark chocolate. I thought I would be okay since I was perfect every other day.

I am really excited with how far I've come and with how quickly, but this is another thing that bothers me. See that shirt I"m wearing?? It's a size XL. An XL. It did fit quite a bit more snug last summer, but still, I can wear the dang thing and it's an XL!!! After all that weight, my upper body is still like a line-backer. I did go running today, but got up too late and could only squeeze in just under 3 miles before conference. Blah again. I just want those last 5 pounds gone! Come on body, you can do this.

 

Also- I realize I'm only 5'3 and I should probably be shooting for 125 or 115, but I don't know if that will happen in this lifetime for me, especially hitting a plateau at 140. I'm telling myself I'm not going to get discouraged until I am this same weight for at least 2 more weeks. OHHH why do people have to eat anyway??

Guns

Yup- arrest me- I got guns!!! Thank you jillian. My arms are getting muscles! Woohoo! Just ask my brothers, I have never had muscles. I keep flexing for Jeebs. If you can't brag to your husband though- who can you brag to? I'm tired of being sore, but having muscles you can see is pretty cool!

Mookie says "Happy Easterzz!"

Oh my- I enjoyed way too many Cadbury mini eggs. But, Easter comes but once a year right?