Monday, May 31, 2010

May 31st...yay! I did it!

I don't know how to wrap up our birthday month appropriately because how do you top the lake bathroom story? If you didn't read it you can click here and believe me it's worth it. So I'll just say I'm so glad that my dad is my dad. He worked and works hard so we could have nice things and a nice life- he took us fishing, skiing and every year we got to go to the Eastman BBQ and have Bodacious BBQ (the best dang bbq in the world). Whenever daddy went somewhere with us we always knew we were going to have fun- and it was highly likely that we'd get a soda pop.

Ezra is so dang loud. He screams for the fun of it. He screamed little short happy screams all through sacrament meeting yesterday. Boys are so loud, but I love them.

I can't decide on a story for myself tonight so Jeebs suggested I make a public apology to all the people I have wronged...seriously wronged. So- sorry to Scott who worked at Taco Bell with me. That was me that clogged the toilet and you had to plunge it because you were working front, but I was too embarrassed to tell you it was me so I lied and said it was the other lady. Sorry it was the most disgusting experience of your life and your face turned green.

Sorry to Annette, my a/c nazi roommate- I was just hot really hot- and Jeebs knew how to make you think your computer was messed up when it really wasn't and so we did. Sorry you had to have every computer science major nerd you knew work on it to try and fix it. I hope you didn't have to spend any money to fix it because it wasn't really broken and I would spend a lot more time in purgatory for that.

Sorry to Shelly for tipping you over in your desk in Government and Economics. Sorry you flipped completely backwards (desk and all) and smacked your head on the floor. Sorry you were dazed for the rest of the day. And, I'm really sorry that I thought it was so freaking hilarious.

Lastly, sorry to everyone who endured all my gross bodily function stories. Hope you enjoyed May!

Sunday, May 30, 2010

May 30...Happy Birthday Daddy

Today is my daddy's birthday- he is 61. Wow. You're getting old daddy. When daddy was a little boy he used to make up poems about Foxy Loxy, a dog named Rover and various other characters. He would recite his poetry for his family and if anybody interrupted him before he was through he would get to start completely over. He was the baby of the family. One of our favorite daddy originals goes : There was a little dog named Rover.
When he died, he died all over
Except for his tail
It just fell over.

Whenever Ezra gets caught in the act of doing something wrong, he immediately drops the all evidence and crawls away from it as fast as he can. Wow- they learn so young.

When I worked at Taco Bell I had to work the drive-thru a lot. It was terribly monotonous. I would dream at night that I was still working and asking repeatedly, "Would you like taco sauce?" So, to mix things up a bit I would put on a fake British accent. It was really funny- to me. I even had people come to the window and say, "oh you've got someone with an accent working here," as they were peering over my shoulder trying to see the British girl working at Taco Bell.

Saturday, May 29, 2010

May 79th...

It feels like it.

My daddy and I watch food network way too much. We make everybody sick and drive everybody crazy. My sister used to love to watch it too. We're all a bunch of foodies- it drives my momma crazy! Whenever I make something new and it turns out delicious, I have to call daddy and tell him about it. If it's sweet he'll say it needs ice cream, if it's savory he'll say it needs peppers.

Ezra is going to be a rock climber (Shelly do you remember this :) I know everybody says that about their babies (why do they love to climb?) He is so dangerous. He isn't happy unless he's flopping around on the couch, climbing on the arms, reaching for the light switch or making a big mess. I love to watch his little baby feet push up to the tip top tippy toes trying to get himself up onto something- I love baby feet.

Friday, May 28, 2010

May I get to stop this in 3 days!

My daddy can work anybody into the ground...anybody. He says, "when you work from can 'til can't, then you can talk to me." If you're tired, sore or overworked don't go to daddy for sympathy.

Ezra had a meltdown on the way home from Sonic. I took the kids for a little drive and an impromptu trip to get slushes. They are half price between 2 and 4 and it just happened to be 2:07 when I pulled in- score. Got the slushes and then started home. I told Cagey to let Ezra have a little of his. Mistake. He was letting the blue coconut dribble down his chin and I didn't want his shirt to get completely ruined so I told Cagey to stop giving him some and wait until we got home. Ezra started fussing and fussing and fussing so I told Cagey to give him one more little sip. Ezra clamped on to Cagey's cup and pulled it as far away from Cagey as he could get it. Cagey was freaking out because Ezra wouldn't let go of his cup and Ezra was freaking out because he wanted that slush all to himself. I kept glancing back- all I could see was the cup being smooshed beyond styrofoam capabilities. I just kept praying it wouldn't bust all over the car. Ezra screamed like he'd been shot after Cagey finally got his drink back. I said a prayer of thanksgiving when we got home with only one tiny blue drop on Ezra's leg- which actually stained his skin. Never again.

I love to dance. I took a lot of ballet in college. I took a couple of semesters of jazz, one semester of tap, and a couple of clogging. I love it! I never had the confidence to really be a dancer or categorize myself as a dancer because of my weight. The weight, the weight! So, I'm watching So You Think You Can Dance and I get a little depressed every year. I need dance in my life. I have dreams that I'm a ballet dancer- dancing on stage and I can pirouette forever en pointe.

Thursday, May 27, 2010

May 27th- still going

One day my dad showed up at my workplace because he knew I was having a bad day. He walked around the store trying to do funny things to cheer me up, but I was such a brat I wouldn't laugh at anything he did. He was in his church suit- he'd just come from doing interviews or was about to go do interviews. It was a pretty funny sight.

Ezra is my first baby to ever go to sleep at night on his own. It's pretty awesome.

Me- I worked at Taco Bell and Hastings in high school. I really wanted a mall job and I really hated people that worked in the mall. Maybe some day...

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

May 26th

My daddy wanted to be a vet when he grew up. He loves dogs and they love him. Percy is always so excited to see daddy when my parental units come to visit. What made you decide against being a vet daddy?

Ezra crawled through a pile of dog poop today. I was trying to keep everybody out of it and was doing so successfully. Then Taylor got hurt and I went to see about her out in the yard. I turned around to see Buggy in slow-motion crawling towards me. I screamed "NO, BUGGY!" It was too late hand, belly, leg- everything went right through it. Luckily, it was a little dry so he only had a little smear on his leg, but...yuck.

Dogs don't usually like me. Whenever we rode our bikes around- the woods, down the street, around our neighborhood- if there were dogs- they'd come after me. Maybe it was because I pedaled slower than my sibs or maybe they could smell fear. I hate big dogs.

Tuesday, May 25, 2010


We watch a lot of Glenn Beck and Jeebs listens to him every day while he works. One of his sponsors is Lifelock, a company that is supposed to protect you against identity theft. Today while one of the neighborhood kids was playing he found a part of one of Cagey's toys. He said "I know what this goes to, I'll find it for you Cagey." I told him that I didn't think we had the other part of that toy anymore and Cagey replied, "that's why I need Lifelock." If they need a spokesperson- I know of a really cute one.

May 25th

My mom and dad are 6 years apart in age. He thought she was too young for him, but my mom fell in love with his laugh. She heard him laughing behind her in Sunday school and had to talk to him. She walked out in front of his car as he was driving out of the church parking lot and he thought she was the prettiest girl he ever saw. The rest is history. I'm sure she'll add her little clarifications and additions in the comments if you're interested in the rest of the story :)
Ezra went through 3 outfits today. He puked on the first outfit, pooped all over the second (and my arm) and then dug into a piece of ABC gum at karate.

The summer I met Jeebs was a bad summer. I had no a/c in my car, I had an a/c nazi for a roommate and my best friend and roommate decided she'd go on a stinkin' mission. So I was lonely and hot...all the time. I spent most of my free time going to movies by myself. When summer was over my mom and little brother came up to go camping. I hate camping, but up in the mountains it is cool even cold. It was heaven up there. I was determined to be up at the campsite in the mountains any time I could because I was sick to death of being hot. One day we were up at the campsite hanging out and my little brother decided he needed to go down to Kamas to get something. He drove my car (or the car my parents let me drive :) He left and I didn't think anything about it. It was about 30 min down the mountain and about 40-45 min to get back up. A couple of hours went by and he wasn't back. I started to get a little anxious, but still he could just be behind slow cars or something. Then another hour and it started raining. He still wasn't back. As it started to rain harder and harder I remembered the windshield wipers. They were in pieces from me scraping them over the frozen windshield in the winter. I started panicking inside, but couldn't admit anything to momma. I just knew he had lost visibility and had ran off the road, down the side of the mountain or into a semi and it was going to be all my fault. After a few more excruciating minutes (felt like another hour) went by he came rolling up into the campsite in "the granny" (our loving nickname for the car). I was so relieved. I confessed everything and Page just laughed. He said when it started raining and he turned on the wipers- they just flapped apart like cheerleader pom-poms and he just laughed because it was so 'Nessa'.

Monday, May 24, 2010

mAy 24th

When I was in high school my dad was called as the Bishop of our ward. Every Wednesday or Thursday night he would have interviews up at the church. I don't know what all went on in these interviews or with his calling in general, but I know it was stressful. On interview night he would always come home with ice cream and/or little debbie's. He would drown his stress in blue bell. It's a good stress reliever (unless not being able to button your pants causes you stress.)

Ezra loves playing on the treadclimber. He and Cagey are becoming quite the pair- Ezra wants to play with everything Cagey does and vice versa. I'm getting Cagey all baby toys for his birthday.

I think Jack Bauer is awesome. Dang Jeebs for getting me into 24. Now it's ending. Series finale tonight- so...later.

Sunday, May 23, 2010

May 23

After Taylor was born, Jeebs and I went to Texas to visit. Jeebs really wanted to go shooting with my dad. We all drove out to my dad's work where there was a shooting range. We started at the shotgun range which had automatic throwers- the high house and the low house. We were shooting daddy's 12 gauge. Jeebs shot and did a decent job. I shot and said a couple of curse words because I didn't realize the gun was going to kick a hole in my shoulder and missed every target. My daddy shot- wow. He stood there with the gun hanging by his hip and just motioned to us to push the button. "PULL!", he nonchalantly lifted the gun and hit every target. He's just naturally good at that kind of stuff- and it's kind of annoying.

Today I held Ezra on my hip while I lead the music for Primary closing exercises. He waved his arm to the music. I think he's going to be a child prodigy: Youngest music director ever!

I am extremely afraid of heights. When I worked out at Texas Eastman with my dad I had to climb up some big structure one time- actually a couple of times. I was up so high we could see Eastman in Tyler I think. I was freaking out inside, but I didn't let the guy I was working with know. My lips went numb, my head was spinning, and I kept trying to inconspicuously check my pulse to make sure my heart hadn't just stopped. There were ladders we had to climb too. They had cages so you could lean back and rest while climbing. I was too short to comfortably lean back on the cages- it sucked. They also put me up in a personnel basket on the end of a crane. The crane operated accidentally set us down on a few pipes which made the basket jolt to one side- I almost soiled my coveralls- no one ever knew. I'm glad I didn't soil my coveralls.

May 22nd...catch up- I tried to get in bed early last night

My dad was always working on our cars, or our family's cars or a friend's boat. There were always motors to work on and daddy was always groveling in the dirt fixing them. If he was home and not asleep he was usually under a car. We took it for granted that if something went wrong with the car daddy could fix it.

Ezra has started saying "Momma". He says it and then looks at me and waits for me to respond with "what?", and then flashes his 5 little baby teeth. Love it.

Speaking of working on cars: My senior year of high school I was driving home from school and decided to stop at the gas station to get some gas and a snack. I got a gold can Dr. Pepper (my favorite drink see here) and a package of sunflower seeds. (Aside: Jeebs loves sunflower seeds too, but he likes his in the shell, I wonder if he was buying sunflower seeds in the shell at the same time I was buying my shelled sunflowers? How romantic, but I digress.) So, I headed on down the road towards home and started to try and open my seeds while I drove. I was glancing down at the package and up at the road. The package said "Easy Open Bag!", and I was thinking to myself, "I'm going to wreck this car trying to open the package and I'm going to have to sue the company because they said it was easy to open!" I looked up and saw my car driving on the shoulder, I jerked the steering wheel to get myself back on course. I over corrected so I jerked it back the other way and the tail of the car spun completely around- I don't know how many times. I was holding on to the steering wheel for dear life and my head was pressed down from the centrifugal force. I felt like I was on the worst roller coaster ride ever and when I got off- if I made if off alive- I'd be dead anyway. When the car came to a stop I was in the grass next to a ditch and turned completely 180 degrees. All was well with me- no injuries- so I turned the ignition and voila! started right up. I would just pull out and go home- no harm done. I put my foot on the gas, the car lurched and then nothing. *#&^#(* I opened my door and looked at the back tire- it was on its side. 800$ worth of damage because I was trying to open my sunflower seeds. My dad fixed it all himself on the side of the road. (I did stand out in the cold for moral support and so he could gripe at me at will during the process) Sorry daddy. I have more stories like this, unfortunately.

This is what I drove in high school. It went through a lot.

Friday, May 21, 2010

May 21

My daddy was always the one that had to help us with our math homework because my mom hates math. I remember him helping me sometimes and I wouldn't have any idea what he was talking about. He would explain it and explain it and I was just happy to have my daddy all to myself. I remember the funny faces he'd pull as he tried to explain regrouping for the tenth time. I pull the same faces now with Taylor.

Many times a day all through the day I sit in this same spot on the couch so I can look at all my blogs and check all my websites. As soon as I sit in this spot Ezra immediately crawls over and starts tugging on my shirt because I am "in the position". This is his nursing spot and he knows it.

I know everybody is going to think I'm crazy (all 7 of you) but one night I saw something really weird. I was probably around 11 or 12 (maybe 14 because I don't remember if Yang was still home or at college) when this happened. For some reason I woke up in the middle of the night. At the top corner of my window was a bright light. The light was about the size of a large flashlight, like those big ones with the handles. The corner of my window was probably 6 feet high. I saw the light completely on and bright and then it started to shrink. It didn't just click off like a flashlight- it lost circumference size and then was gone. I have no idea what it could have been. We live in the boonies. Another incident related to this one- but several years later. My little brother had let his dog outside at night and suddenly saw a light coming out of the sky shining right down to the grass. The dog perked up and looked straight at the light and then it suddenly disappeared. We have always said there is something weird going on in East Mountain, Texas. Page could clarify that story in the comments if you're interested in hearing more about our alien experiences :)

Thursday, May 20, 2010

May 20th... wow only 11 days of May left

My dad had to take a dose of pepto bismol every morning before school. He has a very easily upset stomach- I inherited that from him...yay for me. My mom always says if she had a nickel for every time my daddy would say, "My stomach feels squirrelly," she'd be a very rich woman.

Ezra loves riding in the little car/stroller. I push him down the driveway and Jeebs catches him at the bottom. Jeebs turns him around and hurtles him back up to the top. His mouth hangs wide open and his hair flies up all around his head as he screams with delight. It is the cutest thing ever.

When I was 2 I had to have caps put on my teeth. All of my teeth. I had a silver smile- and always had to answer the "what's wrong with your teeth?" question. If I had only been born now people would say "wow, you have an awesome grill!" When my mom tried to brush my baby teeth they would just crumble in my mouth. Great huh? So- the only surgery I've ever had - I had to be put completely under- was for my dang teeth. I hate having bad teeth. In 3rd grade I broke my two front lower permanent teeth. My dentist still says every time my name is mentioned at my mom's appointments- "That little girl caused a lot of gray hair in my head," not to mention a lot of money in his pockets.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

May 19

Daddy ordering at Papacita's. "I need one.. two... three... 3 specials." hehehehe That doesn't mean anything to anybody except my brother Page.

Ezra thinks Cagey's funny run is hilarious! It really is. I nearly busted a gut when I saw it- I've got to get a video, if we can make him do it again.

I am sick of this town- I just saw online that the school Taylor will be attending has 70% of it's students classified as "economically disadvantaged" and the school that we actually live in the district for has 78% "economically disadvantaged". In the whole county 50% of the students are economically disadvantaged. I'm assuming that means that 50% of students in Craven County schools are registered for free lunches. How are we (the 50%) that are not classified as economically disadvantaged supposed to pay for 100% of the population? It's unsustainable. Socialism works in equalizing everybody in poverty. I for one, don't want to be destitute, do you? My name is Vanessa Nicolaysen and I really want to move.

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

May 18th... is it already May 18th?

My brother Glen wanted me to clarify that not all my sibs were bad fishermen. He caught a bunch of fish today when he was probably supposed to be working :) Actually I would like to take my kids fishing and go with my brother. He didn't take me fishing last time we were in Utah, but I did get to ride on his motorcycle! I thought I was going to die- I screamed the whole time.

okay back to the task at hand...

My dad is a little bit of a McGyver. He can rig anything. Give him some vice grips and some duct tape and he could probably build you a shopping mall- or at least rig the a/c in a 20 yr old car.

Ezra says "what are ya doing?". Every time he would crawl into where Jeebs was working Jeebs would ask him, what are you doing? Eventually he started crawling in there and Jeebs would look at him and he would make the sound like "what are ya doing?" Now he says it all the time when you ask him, "what are you doing?" so cute.

That 20 yr old car my daddy rigged the a/c in? I burnt the @#*$%( out of my finger on his little rigged item. Momma told me to turn off the compressor- which meant pick up the little metal box that's hanging under the dash and switch the toggle (light switch) to off. I did as I was asked, but touched the metal that got extremely hot and burned my finger. I let a bad word slip- one of the first I ever said in my life. Momma couldn't get too mad at me :)

Monday, May 17, 2010

May 17th

Daddy sounds like an airplane when he sleeps. I remember sleeping in between my parents one night because I was sick to my stomach. I was dreaming that I had a big spider on my chest growling at me- when I woke up the spider was still was daddy snoring.

Ezra loves strawberries. I'm just wondering how long it'll be before he hates them. (Can we say Cagey!?!)

I am one of the worst fishermens alive. When we went fishing with daddy I would lose lure after lure- not in fish- in stumps, trees, banks whatever wasn't a fish. I think one fishing trip I lost 3 of my dad's lures. When we went to Boone this last year for a week- I was determined to find somewhere for the kids to fish. We found a trout pond and got all our gear. Jeebs says to me, "you cast out for Cagey- you've done this more times than me." First cast- landed straight in a tree. Jeebs had to cut the line and go back up to get another hook and weight. Yeah, I really shouldn't fish. Since I've pretty much given up m&m's the sport holds no appeal anymore.

Sunday, May 16, 2010


Taylor got her yellow belt. This is Taylor with her Sensei- Mr. Tim. He's a very good teacher and a really nice guy. He did her belt test on Saturday (instead of the usual Sunday) just for us. You know us Mormons are crazy- with the whole keeping the Sabbath day holy and all :)

May 16th

My daddy's dream would be to open a BBQ joint. If there is a large party needing bbq- my daddy is the man. He enjoys all the cooking- staying up watching the meat. He'll get up in the middle of the night to check on his dang meat. Whenever he cooks for a party there is always more food than everybody can eat.

Ezra really enjoyed his first sugar today! Isn't this the cutest picture? Jeebs caught it perfectly!Me: I'm addicted to planning parties.
I even made Jeebs stop on the side of the road on the way home from Greenville so I could pick these gorgeous wildflowers because they went with my color scheme :)

Saturday, May 15, 2010

May 15th- why am I still doing this?

It's late so this post has to be fast cuz I have to get up early for church :)

Daddy- I really can't do his stories justice, so for tonight I'll leave you with this little tidbit about my dad. He LOVED our dog Jackie. She was supposed to be everybody's dog, but her heart belonged to daddy. It might be because he snuggled with her every night before bed and whispered sweet nothings into her ear- just sayin'. Momma was jealous. Every dog loves daddy- except for the one he shot and threw into a ditch in the woods- after it bit me.

Ezra turned 1 today. Taylor came in and sang Happy Birthday to him this morning. We had to go to Greenville for Taylor's belt test so we are officially celebrating tomorrow. Tres leche cake is in the fridge waiting for him.
I wore fake glasses in college because I thought it was stylish. Oh and I love caffeine free Dr. Pepper. I haven't had one in a long time. Why oh why did I drink so many back then- I am surely paying for it now.

ps look at those mountains...I actually miss those mountains.

Friday, May 14, 2010

May 14th

When daddy was growing up he would go to the movies by himself. He loved scary movies- and to this day, any time an old "scary" movie is on daddy says, "I paid good money to see that." Anyway, by the time the movie was over it was usually dark outside. He would start out calmly walking home, but by the time he got to his street he was in a full sprint! He comes by it honestly. If there were any "noises" to be checked out at night, my grandpa Wagley would make my grandma check them out.

Ezra has a 3rd tooth that finally poked through on top. He has a total of 5 teeth!

I love the smell of scotch tape. I hate the smell of school. I took Taylor up to register her for the crack-head school that is Oaks Rd and as soon as the school cafeteria smell hit me I immediately got those nervous knots in my stomach. During my 6th grade school year I missed so much school they wanted to hold me back a grade. I had something like 21 absences. They sent a letter to my mom and made a big deal out of my absences, but then they realized I was the only one in my 6th grade class on the honor roll and receiving the Presidential Academic Fitness Award- among a few other ones.

Thursday, May 13, 2010

May 13th

My daddy can't eat anything without a handful of jalapenos. Everything my mom would make was always said to be "better with jalapenos".

Ezra is having a "Uno Ole!" birthday. I am having fun making the decorations. All of his family will be all 5 of us. It will be a great party complete with a tres leche cake. Can you guess what one of the kinds of milk will be? just kidding.

One of my favorite things to eat- back when I ate store-bought cookies- was pecan sandies with mustard. Yum- try it and lemme know what you think. This post is short and a little lame because Thursday is the TV night of the week. Later.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

May 12th

As the youngest in the family, my daddy had a plethora of 'crappy' jobs to do around the house. My grandparents converted their pasture into a trailer park- or rather, my daddy (at age 14) dug sewer lines all over with a shovel that people could hook into. One day he got the dreaded phone call from his mamma that the sewage lines were plugged. He knew what he had to do. He reached the pipe- it had been crushed. As he was straddling the pipe and trying to pull it out of the ground it suddenly broke free and popped straight up...smacked him right in the mouth. Nasty.

Ezra loves the bath. He gets so excited when I take him in the bathroom to bathe him. He kicks and giggles and I love to watch him. I love to watch him all the time. I could just stare at him all day. I love to watch him pick up little bits of food and put them in his mouth- he's so cute.

When I was in elementary school I was scared of everything- especially getting in trouble. In 5th grade we had a folder we were to keep several assignments in and then turn in the whole thing at the end of the term. My teacher told us that it was a large chunk of our grade- if we didn't turn it in on time it would be a 0. The day it was to be turned in I forgot it at home. I was too shy to ask to call home- so I did the only thing I could think of. I waited for our class to transition into a different subject so I could get down beside my desk and act like I was looking for another book. When our teacher told us to get out a new book I slid down beside my desk, closed my eyes and said a prayer. "Please let momma bring my folder." I got back up in my seat and felt a weight lifted off. I knew my prayer would be answered. Within the hour I happened to look up and I saw in the window my momma. I had never been so happy to see her in all my little life. She had my folder! My name is Vanessa Nicolaysen and I know Heavenly Father answers prayers.

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

May 11th

Do you know who this is? probably not. I had to hear the theme song to his dadgum fishing show every Saturday. This is Bill Dance-my daddy loved Bill Dance... and his sunglasses. The sunglasses were a staple in daddy's wardrobe. Supposedly they made it easier to see down through the murky lake water whilst fishing. I never saw anything whilst fishing- except the m&m bag. yum. And...we're back!
Ezra- his first modeling gig! He even got a free adjustment- a value of $25.

I'm watching the Biggest Loser right now so all I can think about is the first time in my life I decided to lose weight. My freshman year of high school I had a crush on a little nerdy kid in my class- who will remain nameless :) I remember one day in the band hall watching him flirt with one of my skinny friends- he picked her up and stuffed her in a trash can. I was heartbroken. For one, he liked her and two, I knew he could never pick my big butt up and stuff it in a trash can. Thus started my downward spiral into the emotionally unstable relationship I have with the scale. I lost 15 pounds that summer.

Monday, May 10, 2010

May 10th...out of commission

I am sick- my kids are sick. It really should be the rule of nature that mother and offspring can not get sick at the same time. (kind of like you can't sneeze with your eyes open) I can tell you one thing about my dad- he loves a good throw up story. He thinks they're funny. It's been real hilarious around here this weekend. I'll be back tomorrow with more- I know you're all waiting with bated breath.I'll leave you with this cute pic of my chillens- on Saturday before 'the plague' hit. Jeebs made them this cute little picnic table- I love it!

Sunday, May 9, 2010

May 9th

Today at the duck pond I watched the ducks closely ducking their heads under the water and the beads of water rolling right off back into the pond- really kind of cool. If I ever call home and start ranting to my dad about something someone has done or said I know most of the time his response will be, "let it roll off Nessa- like a duck's back." He says that's the reason he doesn't have much gray hair: he never holds grudges. What does that say about Jeebs? hmmmm :)

I don't know if this is about Ezra or me or both, but as I was walking to the duck pond today just him and me I thought about when he was born. It was the hardest experience of my life. I was depressed about it for a long time and still get depressed when I think about it. That's not how childbirth should be. I know, I know- the main goal is a healthy baby and a healthy mom, but we only get to experience birth a finite number of times. I want to experience it the way Heavenly Father intended for it to be. Cagey's birth was so near perfect I long for that experience again. There are no words for the joy I felt that day- unmatched by anything. I snuggled in my bed all day with my new sweet baby, it was pure bliss. I missed that with Taylor and Ezra- I feel cheated.
Now that it has been almost a year I can finally share the "after" pictures. I felt as bad as I looked. After Ezra was born my eyes were so swollen I couldn't open them both at the same time. I couldn't enjoy my baby- I was miserable, can you tell?

Saturday, May 8, 2010

May 8th

My dad does not like horses. He once launched himself over a ditch running from a horse that was charging towards him- along with a poor dog that he was dragging on a leash, who's feet never touched the ground. I don't know if it's a weird coincidence or just that I have funny men in my life, but Jeebs doesn't like cows. He climbed a tree in a pasture once to avoid a cow...he stayed there for quite a while waiting for Bessy to leave. (hehehehe)
Ezra did this to his head today. Lovely.

I peed my pants in kindergarten and I was too shy to ask to go call my mom for clean clothes. I sat in it all day. I rode the bus home with pee pants and walked home in pee pants (they chap too).

Friday, May 7, 2010

May 7th (happy birthday to me)

On road trips when we were little (or even just short car rides) my daddy would get really annoyed at our behavior. We would get louder and louder and voice the common complaints "Glen's breathing my air! Yang's looking at me! Nessa's touching me! Page is making annoying sounds with his lips!" and on and on. The louder we got the quieter my dad would get. When he was getting really annoyed he would do this funny little whistle. He would whistle this little tune over and over. Once the whistling stopped- we knew or at least I knew it was gonna be bad. Heaven forbid we rattle a sack!

Ezra eats seaweed. I know, I CPS. But- he is so excited to eat those black little flakes of grossness- jam packed with nutrients. Fish poo and sea yuck grossness. If you want to know the benefits of nori click here.

I smell my fingernails. There it is- it's out there for all 7 of you faithful nickel blog readers. It's one of those weird things I do, I don't know why I do it. I just do it. What are your weird habits? I expect 7 comments! Ok, that's being a little too optimistic, 3?

Thursday, May 6, 2010

I had to...

Bum Bum Bum

May 6th

My daddy wore this to Temple Square. I need to send a copy of this to the whole stake :) My dad was an awesome athlete. He did it all track, baseball (even though he hated it) and football. I remember as a little girl thinking he could run like the freaking wind. We'd play baseball in our side yard and you could never get him out. He'd either hit the ball deep into the "wooshes" (the woods, for all you non-rednecks) or he'd sprint around the bases before we could even blink. He did it all in his coveralls and boots :) Fast forward to me being 21- and running consistently for exercise- and he could still outrun me dang it! He was 51.

Today Ezra put Percy's foot in his mouth. Percy walks over his own poo all day long. This was after we got home from the farm -where he poked a baby bunny in the eye and pulled out a handful of its fur. That was after I let the cage door slam onto the bunny's head. Then after that- Ezra's mouth caught on fire when I gave him some chicken I had seasoned with cayenne pepper. I really shouldn't be let loose around small animals and children.

My dad's athletic ability didn't fall far from the tree. In a 3rd grade track and field event I got 3rd place in a sit-up competition (can you sense the sarcasm? I was actually pretty proud of myself, which further drives home my point) Then in the 200 meter sprint? (is that a race?) I got 7th out of 8. The girl that came in eighth was from my same school- I blame the school, wouldn't you?

The less-fortunate get all the breaks

Again, since the title of this blog is "... our Thoughts", I, James, will add my thoughts from time to time.

I'll be the first to admit that I'm a hack at my job. I maintain a chewing-gum-and-duct-tape mess of Flash Actionscript2 code that amasses somehow into a training application. It's in constant need of tweaks and bug fixes. Every time I get a new feature request I attack with the goal of as little code change as possible out of fear that the whole thing will come crashing down if I add too much to it.

The current tweak is adding screen reader compatibility for the sight-impaired. The request for this feature came from a certain nationwide 3g phone network (you can figure it out of you think of a former ad campaign that has an ironic link to the feature being requested) which likely employs no more than 2 sight-impaired tech support employees. The training also becomes available, in part, to the public after the phone launches.

As I'm struggling through the mountains of code, trying to find the least extensive way to solve my problems I realize 2 things: first, It would probably be cheaper for my company to hire a person to read the screen to the one or two people who need it; and second, this is a touch screen phone which I imagine is virtually impossible for a blind person to use.

Common sense is not so common anymore.

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

May 5th

Even though my daddy lived at the same time as my mom- his stories make his life seem like world away from my mom. They had cows and chickens and sometimes pigs. When my daddy was a little boy he had a pig named Pinky. His daddy would go down to the pig pen and just shoot in amongst the pigs. They would all start running away from the gunfire except for Pinky. My daddy's words of wisdom, "Don't become friends with a pig, you're gonna end up eating him."

Ezra is getting a baby mullet with little curls. I love it. I've never had a child with this much hair at this point and I can't stand to think about cutting it even though Jeebs keeps mentioning the fact that he has a mullet.

When I was younger- I think about 12 or 13- I mentally destroyed a kitten. My cat had litters upon litters of kittens. One of them in particular was so sweet and cute and I took him over as mine- well he was mine for the 6 weeks before we gave them away. Somehow he had gotten really wet in the bathroom. So, I did what any sane person would do to dry off a cat- get out the hairdryer. I have never seen a cat, or any animal for that matter, jump without bending it's legs. It was like the cat was disappearing and reappearing in places- he was moving so fast. It was the craziest thing I've ever seen. He was never really right after that. My once calm, sweet kitten became a jittery, jerky little freak of an animal. I felt kind of bad, but dang, it was just a hairdryer!

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

May 4th


My daddy is so funny- he's not easily phased by anything...anything- except- a fast food drive-thru. He hates them. But, in Santa Rosa, New Mexico, after driving all day- he stopped and went through the Mcdonald's drive-thru. For what? a dadgum green chile cheeseburger, the man loves him a green chili cheeseburger.


Ezra took his first few steps today. He has been standing on his own for a few weeks, but today he actually stepped along and made the effort to move while standing! He did it a few times until we called Jeebs in and tried to make him do it. I can't believe he's walking :(


I worked at a book, video, and music store in high school and for a little time after. After braving the cash register and putting up with the public for over a year I finally got to work as a stocker. That meant I was in the back if I wasn't out on the floor stocking :) It got boring sometimes so we would go out the back door and take in a little fresh air. The back of the store overlooked a golf course. One of my co-workers and I decided we needed to make the golfers lives a little less luxurious and we started throwing rocks on to the golf course. I know, I know- stupid. I think he actually hit someone accidentally- that was when we ran inside. No one was hurt in the making of this story:)

Monday, May 3, 2010

May 3rd: you'll wanna read this one


My daddy loves to fish. (Wouldn't that be dull if I left it at that? Yeah- so I'm not.) Daddy always uses the bathroom before he puts in the boat- because nobody likes to hang over the side or use the live well or race back straight legging it to the shore (just trust me if you don't know- or read on to the section about me). So, following habit he went up to the bathroom to relieve any pressure before getting out on the lake. I'm sure he chose the stall he always goes in- because that is daddy- same route, same stop, same bathroom, same stall. As he sat, relieving the aforementioned pressure, he scanned the stall door for a good read and sees a scribbled little invitation,
"for a good time- be here tuesday 10 am"
It's Tuesday... Daddy slowly lifts his watch to eye's 10 am. At that moment all planets aligned and the door to the bathroom swung open. Daddy leaned forward on the bowl and clamped his hand around the bottom of the stall door with a force that would rival a vise grip. Heaven help that man if he had tried to open daddy's stall door- I can only imagine the tussle that would have ensued. Aren't you glad you stayed for that?

Post Edit: This is my daddy's version he just sent in an email- better than mine :)

"Picture this in your mind - 5:30 in the morning - sitting on the pot - stall door will not lock - read note - door opens to bathroom at exact time on the stall door that won't lock - death grip on bottom of stall door until person who came in leaves again - no color in hand from tight grip - red face with veins sticking out from leaning over to hold door"


One of the most characteristic things about Ezra is his high pitched, bloodcurdling scream. It's like he is screaming to the heavens, "How could you send me here? Have you met my mother? She's certifiably insane and when the milk lets down I see my life flash before my eyes!!"


Since daddy's story happened at Lake O' the Pines I thought I'd share my story that happened at the lake. We started water skiing when Page and I were really young. We had special little training skis. They were connected. I think I was 7 or 8 when I started skiing and the skis were so short that it was hard to stand- you had to ski in a squat position. The upside of the training skis was that they were connected- the downside was that up through that connection, whilst skiing, shot a very high powered stream o' water up between the legs. I received my very first enema this way...on the worked extremely well. In the words of Homestar: I was growling and pooping all over the place. Disgusting. Enjoy that?

Sunday, May 2, 2010

May 2nd

My daddy:

For most of my childhood my daddy worked 2 jobs so my mom could stay home with us. It was so important to my mom and to him that we have her home so we could be home. We loved being home!


Ezra was the most easily startled baby. When he was in my belly my hips would pop and snap all the time. When I would lay still for a while and then pop my pelvis- I could feel him jump. I loved it.


I have clogged toilets from east Texas to the mountains of Colorado. I say again though- I can't be held too responsible if you're going to put low-flow toilets in public restrooms. My name is Vanessa Nicolaysen and I hate low-flow toilets.

Okay coming up with things to tell about myself has proved more difficult than I thought. We'll see how far into May I get.

Saturday, May 1, 2010


If this is what it takes for me to get a shower, so be it. Plus, think of all the environmentalists he's irritating wasting all that toilet paper, that's my boy!

It's May! It's May!

It is officially my birthday month... and Ezra's and Daddy's. So, to start off this momentous occasion I've decided to share a little unknown (or lesser known) tidbit about all of us each and every day of May. AHHHH May.Daddy:
My daddy hates camping, he just does it because my mom loves it. I think this is why I didn't get my bum torn up too much with all the complaining I did. My daddy was right there with me, he just knew how to suffer in silence.
I was nursing Ezra last night and he started humming and doing a funny head bop dance thing while he was attached. It may sound gross or weird to some, but to him it was just dinner and dancing :)

I once did this to my hair. I thought it was cool for a few days and then I realized I just couldn't go in for a temple recommend interview like this- so I changed it after a couple of months.

I was trying to make a face that my little brother could put on the cover of his band's album. Apparently I didn't make the cut. Dag.